Grounds for divorce is the legal term applied to the reasoning behind your decision to seek a divorce from your spouse. Once you have made the decision to file for divorce, you need to consider whether or not you want to ‘find grounds’. In layman’s terms, you are simply deciding if you want to point to a specific reason for the divorce, or if you want to argue that neither party was at fault, and it was a mutual failure to make the marriage work.
If you choose not to seek grounds for divorce, you are said to be filing a ‘no-fault’ divorce which is commonly referred to as ‘irreconcilable differences’, basically that you and your spouse simply cannot get along well enough to continue the marriage. If you decide to seek grounds for divorce, you will be required to cite a reason that caused you to want to end the marriage, although you must be ensure that the reason you are seeking as grounds is accepted by your state laws. Typical grounds for divorce are cruelty, adultery, or confinement in prison.
The reason why many people want to avoid a no-fault divorce is that many state laws mandate that the couple must endure a cooling off period where they live separately, usually for 6 months but it can often be much longer, before the court will grant the divorce. Obviously this is an unappealing solution to many people who are involved in another relationship or to those who simply want to move on with their lives.
The advantages to seeking an at fault divorce is that you are able to avoid the waiting period before divorce is granted by the court, and in many states if one spouse is able to convincingly prove fault, they can be entitled to a larger divorce settlement than would otherwise be the case. However in order to prove fault there is often a lengthy and drawn out court battle between the spouses, which understandably can be extremely emotional and costly. It is wise to think very carefully before filing an at fault divorce as often the emotional and financial costs outweigh the potential benefits.
When considering grounds for divorce, you must try and put aside emotions and deal strictly with the costs and benefits of doing so. This advice applies to both parties in the proceedings, often it is simply not worthwhile to mount a defense to an at fault divorce claim due to the onerous court costs and lengthy time associated with such a defense. Increasingly couples are finding a way to work the decision into the divorce settlement process, where one side will accept fault for the divorce to allow both sides to move on, and in exchange will negotiate a fair financial settlement to present to the courts. It is also important to note that one spouse can NOT stop a no fault divorce proceeding against them, as simply filing the papers is proof enough of ‘irreconcilable differences’. It is possible to prevent an at fault divorce from proceeding if one spouse can argue why the grounds are invalid, but it is quite difficult to do so, as there is a strong theme in modern public policy not forcing people to stay in a marriage when they want out.